Personalities of the Week - Wednesday

6am Wednesday

The thistly spiked Wednesday Morning was alert and awake long before Kayleigh had even realised that she had fallen asleep in her arm chair. It had made certain that the door to the bedroom of her one woman flat was firmly shut and that, consequently, the incessant beeping of her alarm clock would not raise her from sleep. It had figured that a late start to the day, perhaps coupled with mistakes such as dribbling toothpaste down her clean shirt and burning some toast, may be enough to make her forget Lewis. Luckily for Kayleigh, Wednesday Morning had not banked on Tuffty's internal "I need feeding" alarm being in working order. As it was, she was calmly awoken by the mewing and head butting of a famished cat, just before her alarm would go off. There were no issues with tooth paste or toast, and Kayleigh's mind was still firmly set on the topic of her missing text messages.

Lewis too had managed to escape the planning of Wednesday Morning, it's deviousness just didn't cut it when it came to dealing with humans. It had tried similar plans with him, however he didn't have to get up at a set time, wasn't wearing a shirt when he brushed his teeth and decided this morning to have "Frosties" for breakfast. An nerdy, and somewhat frustrated, Wednesday Morning grappled too with Lewis's thoughts of Kayleigh, before becoming slightly embarrassed by the images it was intercepting and having to have a brisk cold shower to calm it's nerves.

12 noon Wednesday

Wednesday Morning whizzed passed in it's mortified state of shock, refusing to be seen anywhere near either of the humans after the vivid and somewhat disturbing, (for a creature with no reproductive organs) imagery it had witnessed earlier on.

This abrupt disappearance of Wednesday Morning may have been the reason that Wednesday Afternoon almost failed to turn up all together. Due to a chemical imbalance in the creatures molecules, it found itself unable to metamorphosize in the normal way into Wednesday Afternoon. Usually the spikes that, quite inelegantly, adorned it's oval body would start to splinter, making way for the scruffy appearance of the Afternoon and initializing the process of becoming the gloopy Thursday. Only today, presumably as a reaction to shock, it lost all it's spikes in one sharp movement making it almost instantaneously Wednesday Night.

6pm Wednesday

As a consequence of this time warping, conversations were made in warehouses, parks and in seedy back alley pubs all over the world about how quickly the day had gone, how little they had managed to achieve and, although possibly completely unconnected, how the price of rail travel was directly related to the annual rainfall.

For Kayliegh, the day's speed had been a blessing. She had been granted the privilege of acting as the bosses secretary for the day. She was unsure exactly what earned her this opportunity and equally as unsure what had given him the right to treat her like a fax, email, printer and waitress combi machine for the day. It was not until she was driving home, unusually in the dark, did she realise just how little of, what seamed to her like a normal day, she could remember.

Lewis was used to days zooming passed in a daze, so was probably the least affected by Wednesday Morning's shocked reaction. He had spent his day, as usual, sitting in his home office making phone calls to those who mattered and casually earning nearly £17,747 (before tax). Although he considered this somewhat of an underachievement, he put his shortcomings down to his mind being elsewhere as apposed to the shortening of the day. Ironically, he wasn't wrong in his judgment.

9pm Wednesday

After the "technical" problems experienced during the rest of the day, Wednesday Night had been offered a hefty bonus and the possibility of extended leave, (to be covered by Thursday Morning in disguise), should he be able to successfully block any contact between Kayleigh and Lewis. Happy in the knowledge that bonuses often lead to promotion and the possibility of being responsible for a whole week, (he had his eye on the last week of March in time for the tax year issues) he had been on the case as soon as he had been able to straighten his tail.

It's plans, to destroy all methods of communication in both humanoids houses, were, as far as it was concerned, going extremely well. Unfortunately for it, Wednesday Night had been off sick when the training on communication methods had been given.

Kayleigh arrived home to see that Tuffty, completely out of character, but very cleverly, had removed at least 30% of the springs from the two piece suite. After examining the debris that lay on the floor and deciding that it was clearly something to do with the poor cat's medication she wandered into her kitchenette, only to find further oddities; Tea spoons, it is said, have a tendency to disappear, usually in pairs. Kayleigh was aware of this, but had never before seen them quite so strangely stuck to the tiles with blue-tack in x shapes. Unsure of what to do, but a complete disbeliever in anything supernatural, Kayliegh settled down to her evening routine as usual, certain that she must have been sleep walking the night before and concocted this strange work of art then. She zapped her meal for one, sat on her, now rather uncomfortable, chair for one and, under the watchful eye of the completely oblivious Wednesday Night, prepared to text Lewis.

He meanwhile, had experienced some equally odd occurrences in his house; Lewis owned no animals to attack his sofa, yet as he sat down on it, springs began to slowly crack through the burnt red leather covering. Concerned, and rather irritated as it was only a month old, he returned to his office to find the warrantee certificate. Mysteriously, his keys, all of the keys he owned, possibly ever owned given the amount of them, were piled up in front of his keyboard. Lewis stared in bewilderment for a moment before trying to rationalize the situation then deciding to leave the house, in somewhat of a hurry, to have at least one triple vodka at his local.

Wednesday Night giggled geekily in triumph… Lewis had left his phone on the living room table and it was merrily beeping away to itself as a message bubbled through the airwaves from Kayleigh's phone.

Proud of his achievements and dreaming blissfully of tax returns, Wednesday Night began is desolidification into the splurgy mass of Thursday Morning.