A Dream to Live

The breeze whispered. Flashes of crimson and sapphire lightning danced in the darkness, illuminating an ocean of human bodies. Their arms flailed. Men and women moaned in tortured pain. An ocean of garnet life seeped out from their flesh and mixed with their sweat, excrement and tears. The wind howled and then came the voices. Some cooed in high pitched inquiry while others snarled with vengeful accusation. Stranded on a dirt, death soaked mound, a lanky girl writhed, clawing at her head. Her long, slender fingers caught at her smoky bronze hair and her slate eyes were wide with horror.

"What are you doing here?" the voices cooed.

"Get out!" the voices snarled.

The questions lashed at her ear drums as she tore at her hair, wildly screaming though no sound ever erupted from her throat. Thoughts coming too fast to completely form, she managed to focus on the need to survive and her steady mental cry for the vision to disappear. Finally, she retched and the image pulsated to life with technicolor radiance and odd polygonal structures. Creatures of amoebic consistency grinned at her with blinking eyes of brilliant white light.

The sickness lifted briefly, allowing her to stare in wonderment. Soft resounding beeping and whispering spiral whistles echoed about her. She floated weightlessly in the world of neon. The world vanished with a violent retch of her bowels.

"Why have you come?" a voice gently inquired.

Tiny spheres of light spiraled in the darkness. She relaxed, realizing that there was no need to fear death. Consciousness continues on, souls seeking truths and knowledge eternal. Pressure grew in her throat and she jerked forward again with a violent heave, spewing maggots and leeches from her body. Negative thoughts and ill feelings cleansed themselves from her soul, leaving her to a listless state of consciousness. The universe shifted.

"Learn," another voice whispered.

Dimensions spiraled around her as she closed her eyes and then slowly opened them. A shelter came into focus, her body huddled in the fetal position on a bed of layered furs, a woven blanket twisted about her form. The sickness seemed to have nearly gone. Steadily, softly, she took in a deep breath and then exhaled.

"How are you feeling?" a familiar voice spoke.

Her eyes scanned for the source, catching the gaze of an elder priest. He was tall and concern radiated from him in a wave of warmth she could touch. "Sick," she muttered.

"Come now," he whispered, reaching an aged, thin hand to her brow.

She reached out and took his hand. When she stood, her slate eyes focused for a moment and then she sighed. "Cleanse yourself," he guided, leading her to a canopied waterfall.

The shelter was made of mud and logs lodged together, overgrown with moss. The priest touched her shoulder, drawing her attention as he gently pulled the blanket from her shoulders. "Into the water now." He smiled, folding the blanket over his left arm.

She stripped herself of her soiled garments and slowly entered the cool water. With each step she felt better. She let the crystalline water drench her hair and purify her body. After a few minutes, she exited and looked to the priest. "Thank you," she whispered as he handed her another blanket.

"Come, Lenasya, it is time for you to rest now and reflect upon what you have learned." He put his arm around her and guided her back to the shelter. "Remember everything you saw and then try to find the meaning of it all. You know what you came to do."

"Yes, of course. Thank you, Gushroom," Lenasya looked up at him and nodded before lying back down in the bed of furs. For a moment, she watched him straighten out the pelts and clean up the few she'd retched upon. With a smile, he bowed and then left her to rest. When her lids closed, she realized how hard rest would be.

Before long, she found herself weightless and floating in the universe once more, while stars spiraled and danced across her vision. The voices returned, whispering and cooing. Her life flashed before her eyes, all the faults and mistakes, things she could and could not fix. This time Lenasya was not so overwhelmed by her visions. Lenasya was able to make connections and realize how to fix those faults. "I understand," she thought.

Finally, the dreams vanished and she was left in complete darkness, finally able to sleep. She awoke the next morning to the comfort of her own, modern day, bedroom. The shock caused her to sit up in bed with a jerk. "How did I...?" she began to wonder, but then realized, "It was a dream?"

Lenasya's gaze fell to the picture on her bedside table. "You're still gone..." She picked up the empty bottle of pills next to the picture, clutching her pillow tight to her chest, she sobbed.

"It was all a dream..." She put down the empty bottle. "I can't follow you. I'm sorry. There are still people that need me here." Lenasya picked up the picture and gently kissed it.